i don't like sucking hair
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
