Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Randomize
