Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
