where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Randomize
