Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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