Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Randomize
