Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Randomize
