there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
