spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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