That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
