i permit you to call me
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize
