she kept yelling 'call me bella'
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
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