Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
