what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
