when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Randomize
