Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
