What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
