im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
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