Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
