This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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