the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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