just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Randomize
