How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
