I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Everything about him screamed your future.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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