I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Randomize
