Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Randomize
