he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize
