She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
