She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
