she was so not down for the gang bang
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
