So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
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