i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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