just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
