I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Randomize
