im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
