It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I think a kid would responsible me up
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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