I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
