My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
