Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
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