I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize
