marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
high people should be assigned attendants
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize