Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Randomize
