Rock
Scissors
Fuck
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
