I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
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