kristin has been a bad kristin
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Randomize
