it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
