We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
