like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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