Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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