Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
this will be a night to untag.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Randomize
